A Conversation with the Counselor

Posted on Mon Sep 8th, 2025 @ 12:43pm by Lieutenant Commander Callie Raven-Grayson & Lieutenant JG Benjamin "Ben" Dalton

1,372 words; about a 7 minute read

Mission: Holding Pattern Hijinks
Location: Counseling Complex
Timeline: Current

Ben sat in his wheelchair outside Counselor Raven- Grayson's office and his doubts returned. He had told the yeoman about his appointment and now waited to be seen. He was sure the counselor had her own personal issues to deal with from the last mission and he didn't want to add his problem to hers. maybe he should just leave before it was too late to do so.

Callie was aware of someone outside in the waiting area, her empathic senses came in handy that way. Walking over to thr door she looked out seeing someone there. “Hello, please come on in.”

"Thank you." Ben answered as he rolled in. "I know you must be extremely busy with what occurred during the last mission so I thank you for taking the time to see me."

“I’m always available for those who need to see me” Callie smiled warmly, actually she was glad for the distraction, it meant she didn’t have to dwell on what happened to both her and Jon.

"I appreciate that Counselor but you have a husband and family to take care of as well as yourself. Maybe, I should go. I don't want to add to your full plate and my reason for coming doesn't seem that important now."

“No, hold on Ben” Callie offered a smile. “You came here to see me for a reason, so tell me what’s on your mind.”

He looked down at his legs and then back at Callie, "My legs, my new legs." He said simply.

Callie nodded. “You’re struggling with the transition to your new legs, that’s not surprising.”

He nodded glumly, "Yes ma'am. I certainly am. Viviana said the surgery was a success, so I don't know why this is so difficult for me.'

“Ben you’ve been through a tremendous amount” Callie offered a caring smile. “The trauma of what happened to you is still there, even though you have new legs. To accept it all just like that isn’t really realistic, it’ll take time to process it all and accept it.”

"I understand at least i think I do but my mind, body isn't getting the messages. I just want to move on, get past all this." He admitted. "And it just leaves me more frustrated that I'm not."

Callie nodded. “It’s not something that’s that easy to get over, you’ve lost a part of you, and had replacements that aren’t really a true part of you. It’s traumatic to face what you lost, let alone adjust to what you have now.”

"That message is coming through loud and clear counselor. This is much harder than I thought it would be. What have I got to do to begin getting past this?" Ben asked hoping the counselor would have an answer.

“There is no quick fix to this Ben” Callie offered gently. “You have to accept what’s happened, and in time you will. Right now it’s all still fresh in your mind, and to your body. Just try not to dwell on what you’ve lost, but more on what you’ve gained.”

Ben nodded, Easier said than done counselor when everyday I look down and see a pair of legs that aren't truly mine but I do understand what you are saying. I know what I lost but what I have gained eludes me."

“I understand Ben, I really do.” Callie offered calmly. “To lose a part of yourself, then gain something that isn’t truly you yet it’s a very important part of you. Don’t be afraid to use those new legs, it’s all a part of recovering.”

Ben looked at Callie, heard her words and understood what she was saying. How did he make her understand what he was feeling? He sighed and just blurt out, "I don't trust these legs. They aren't mine and they don't feel a part of me."

“Ahhh there we go” Callie nodded. “I knew you’d find a way to express it eventually. I know it must seem strange, having legs that aren’t naturally yours, but they are a part of you now. In time you’ll learn to trust using them, but for now it’s going to be trial and error. Would you like me to be there for your first physio appointment?”

Ben nodded at Callie's observation. "Very true Counselor, I don't trust them. I hope your right in that I do learn to trust them." He sighed, "Trial and error, doesn't sound like fun but if it gets me to walking, I'm all for it." He looked across at Callie, "If you could yes, but I know you have other patients and your own family to look after."

“I can make the time between my other patients to be there for you, without interfering with my family time. I do appreciate you being concerned about that though.” Callie smiled warmly. “Just let me know when your appointments are, I’ll do my upmost to be there to support you.”

Ben nodded, "Once I have the information I will make sure you get it. I'm hoping Kate will be there as well for them." He grew silent then started speaking again. "I always thought I was a strong positive person but right now, I don't feel strong or positive."

“It’ll return in time Ben, they say time heals all wounds and that’s true in most cases.” Callie smiled warmly. “I’ve never lost a limb, but I did suffer two miscarriages in the past. Trauma stays with you, it’s how you deal with it that defines how you carry on.”

"I'm sorry Counselor." Ben replied sincerely at hearing of Callie's two miscarriages. "This will stay with me forever, I'm sure of it but I won't give in to it. It's just hard right now." He admitted and felt weak doing so.

“Well you’ve started recovery all on your own by admitting that you’re struggling.” Callie offered. “Recovery isn’t going to be fast, there’ll be times when you just want to throw in the towel and give up, but don’t. You can do this, and I’ll be right there with you to support you. If Kate needs to talk then point her in my direction.”

Ben nodded, "I'm in this for the long haul." He admitted. "I just didn't realize how difficult this was going to be. In my mind, I saw myself walking, running do all the normal' things but reality has been a different story." He stopped, "I'll be sure to tell Kate."

Callie nodded. “Learning to walk again is going to take time, I know I keep saying it but that’s how it’s going to be.” She offered a comforting smile. “Don’t force it, even tiny improvement is better than no improvement.”

Ben nodded, "That makes sense Counselor, you crawl before you walk and you walk before you run. I am like a new born baby right now." He observed.

“Exactly, newly born and ready to learn” Callie smiled. “One step at a time, don’t expect too much too soon and you won’t be disappointed.”

"I'll try to remember that but won't make any promises." Ben answered with a smile.

“I can’t ask more than that” Callie smiled warmly. “Plus my door is always open when you need to talk.”

Ben nodded gratefully at Callie's offer. "Thank you Counselor, its nice to know that I have the option there and available if I need it."

“When you need it” Callie offered with a wry smile. “It’s going to be a long road Ben, but you’ve got all of us to help you don’t forget that.”

"I won't forget Counselor, I promise you that and thank you." Ben replied.

“My pleasure” Callie grinned. “Now go find Kate, and the two of you enjoy some time together. It’s just what you need.”

"Yes Commander and thank you! I will do that," Ben assured her.

Callie smiled as she walked as far as the door with Ben. “Take care Ben.”

 

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