What the Future Holds

Posted on Wed Aug 20th, 2025 @ 3:42pm by Lieutenant JG Benjamin "Ben" Dalton

809 words; about a 4 minute read

Mission: Holding Pattern Hijinks
Location: Ben and Kate's Quarters
Timeline: Current

Ben was alone in the quarters he and Kate shared and that wasn't good. Being alone meant he had time to think about all that had happened along with dealing with what might happen. he was in his wheelchair looking down at his new legs, his real legs sliced away as he protected Kate. Did he regret his decision? Indeed not. He would do it all over again to keep Kate safe.

However now, sitting by himself doubts crept into his mind. Would Kate continue to say with him or would she find someone new, someone undamaged. The rational part of his brain was telling him he was being silly that Kate loved him and would continue to love him. He angrily pushed the thought away into a dark corner of his mind to hopefully be revisited but he had his doubts. Then he chided himself for having the thought in the first place.

His hand went to his legs and he tenderly touched them. There was no pain in doing so but they were still new and it took some getting use to to look down and see legs and not stumps.
He felt the skin beneath his fingers so smooth, without flaws. Not a blemish to be seen. Viviana had done a masterful job and he needed to tell her so. But now the real work began to walk, to use the legs like they weren't biosynthesized and that was proving to be a lot harder than he expected. "Why?" He said aloud to the empty room. "Why is this so hard?" Silence was his answer but he knew the answer even if he didn't want to admit it. It was him, he was the problem. He didn't trust his new legs.
Had absolutely zero confidence in them. He had visions of himself lying in a heap on the floor, his legs buckling underneath him.

"Come on Ben!" He challenged himself. "You can do this." But could he? Could he walk, run do everything he had done before. when it was a struggle to just stand up. Could he be the man Kate fell in love with. He honestly didn't know and that scared him. Sacred him deeply. He wasn't use to having doubts especially about himself. He had always been confident in his abilities to handle whatever came his way and now that confidence was taking a terrible beating. He sighed deeply glad Kate wasn't here to see this. His having doubts about not being the man he had been before the loss of his legs. He wasn't a psychic and didn't know what the future held but right now he wasn't liking what he was seeing.

"Crawl before you walk, walk before you run. One step at a time." He said almost a mantra he pushed himself up to stand on wobbly legs. He slowly removed his hands from the arms of the chair and stood there weaving slightly, the image of wheat blowing in a field filled his mind. He looked down and took a step with his left leg. So far so good. Then he moved his right leg to join his left one so he was completely clear of the wheel chair. He was still weaving but standing upright. A few more steps and he was now ten feet from the chair. He was beginning to feel good about his small progress when disaster struck he went to turn around to head back to the chair and his legs got tangled up, throwing his balance off and sending him crashing to the floor. He lay in a heap, tears filling his eyes as he cried in frustration and anger, pounding his fist on the floor in helpless rage. He lay there for the longest time, unmoving just crying. He wasn't hurt just his pride damaged and slowly falling away leaving his exposed. Then somewhere in the recesses of his mind it occurred he needed to get back to the wheelchair before Kate came back. He couldn't let her see him like this! He slowly crawled over to the wheelchair one hand going out to latch onto one of the chair's arms with a vise like grip and slowly, he pulled him up and back into the chair. Once he was situated he wiped his face, his thoughts so awash, so jumbled.it would do no good for Kate to see him crying. He didn't want her to think he was weak. He needed to talk to Viviana or perhaps Counselor Raven- Grayson. Or go to holodeck and search out someone to talk to. One thing was for sure, This was going to a lot harder and much more involved than he first thought. There would be no quick fix if a fix was even possible. Humpty Dumpty may just be beyond repair.

 

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