Talk to Me! (Backpost)

Posted on Wed May 14th, 2025 @ 5:30am by Lieutenant Commander Callie Raven-Grayson & Commander Jonathan Grayson

1,549 words; about a 8 minute read

Mission: Cead Mile Failte
Location: Various
Timeline: Before Morning in Sickbay

Anyone looking at Commander Jonathan Grayson would never ne able to tell he was troubled. The bright smile, the encouraging word a joke here and there were all cover ups for his troubles. It had been building for a while. Jon felt terribly guilty over this last away mission. People he liked got hurt. Kate and been cut open for Christ's sake! Phoenix and Seth were both tortured burned and or electrocuted. Inara and Anaya were both tortured but the worst was Callie. Her mind had been invaded and in a desperate attempt to stop the invasion she had shut down her conscious mind withdrawing deep inside it to save herself. It had taken him going inside her mind, finding her and bringing her back to the world of realty. It had shaken him. Callie was his world. he would be lost without her.

His shift had ended and he headed to the quarters he, Callie and their children shared. Putting on a bright smile he entered and breathed a sigh of relief. He was the first one home. He nodded to himself and closed off what was troubling him. Callie might sense something was bothering him but she wouldn't know the magnitude or so he hoped.

Callie arrived home early, being on light duties she had arranged for a couple of hours of babysitting so she and Jon could have some time alone. Walking in she could immediately feel the change in the atmosphere of the room, though not fully how deep it went thanks to the problems with her senses. “Hi handsome, I’m home.” She offered a warm smile.

Flashing a bright smile, Jon got up from the couch. "Hi beautiful. Welcome home." He greeted Callie as he reached her and gave her a soft kiss on her lips.

Callie returned the kiss with all the love she felt for Jon, but as their lips parted she gave him a curious look. “What’s wrong? You don’t feel the same to me somehow…” she paused. “Sorry my senses are off, Sam thinks it due to the trauma.”

Jon chuckled at her statement. He took her hand and placed it on his cheek. How does that feel?" He joked making light of her statement. He nodded, "You did suffer trauma love. I know, I was inside that pretty head of yours."

“Don't ever forget that I’m always inside yours, at least in a way” Callie offered as she looked into his eyes. “Don’t feel you have to protect me Jon, you were injured too.”

"I know you are Callie, there's plenty of room inside my mind. All that empty space." He joked and then grew serious. "You are wrong darling. I do have to protect you as you are the most precious thing in the world to me."

Callie gently took hold of Jon’s hand leading him across to the sofa. Taking a seat she looked up at him. “Stop protecting me for one minute, and talk to me Jon. Don’t bottle it up, please!”

Following Callie to the sofa he sat next to her, she was still holding his hand. He was quiet for several seconds. Then he spoke softly, looking at her. "I protect you not because you are weak or unable to protect yourself. You are the strongest woman I know. I protect you out of love." He finished.

Callie let go of Jon’s hand to let him get comfortable before taking hold of both hands. “I know you do, without you I would still be hiding away in the recesses of my own mind. I knew that it wasn’t the real you in the mindscape they conjured up for me, it was convincing, but I just knew.”

A small smile appeared on Jon's face. "I hope you always know and it proves just how smart and strong you are. I am always on your side. Your biggest supporter." His hand still holding hers as if to give him strength.

“So…?” Callie looked into Jon’s eyes waiting for him to tell her what he was holding onto. “Stop bottling it up Jon, Talk to me!”

He was silent as the seconds ticked by then he spoke in a low voice. "I'm guilty Callie. I'm guilty of failing the people I like and care about but mostly I'm guilty of failing you."

Callie could feel her husband’s emotions stewing under the surface, and she could see it on his face. “No, don’t do that. You’re not to blame for what happened. None of us knew what was going to happen down there, I didn’t sense the threat either. You haven’t failed me, there was nothing you could have done.”

"I was in command of the away team. The responsibility is mine and mine alone." He looked at her, his face anguished. "I should have known! I should have been prepared. Been on guard. My God we were in a colony calling itself New Germany. That should have raised all kinds of red flags."

“We couldn’t just condemn them without giving them a chance” Callie offered. “We had to see what their civilisation was truly like. Unfortunately we found out the hard way.”

A small smile appeared on Jon's face. We did learn the hard way," He paused, "You have a wonderful talent for understatement love."

“I know!” Callie gave a smirk. “Better that than overstatement I guess!” She couldn’t help but giggle.

Jon couldn't help but chuckle at that. He loved Callie totally. Her optimism and her positive outlook. "I suppose that is true." He finished with a shake of his head.

“Jon I…” Callie paused. “I’m having nightmares, that’s why I was up so early this morning. I had to go check if I was truly at home by checking on the kids.” She hung her head. “I should have told you, I’m sorry.”

Jon reached out and brought Callie close to him as he looped an arm around her. "Callie don't apologize and you have nothing to be sorry for, It seems we were both keeping secrets. We talk about we mean to each other and that is true but then we keep secrets and that is wrong." He looked at beautiful face, "You are my wife, my best friend, confidant and lover. If I can't talk to you, I'm in big trouble."

“You and me both!” Callie offered a more cheery smile. “I’ve asked Deanna to teach me how to protect my mind, she’s agreed to do it. Would you mind if I did it? I don’t ever want my mind invaded like that again Jon, I couldn’t take it.”

Jon hugged her close, "Mind? Why would i mind? I want you to be able to defend yourself both physically and mentally and if Deanna can help you from the mental standpoint, I'm all for it. Maybe you should also take some training in unarmed fighting as well. I'd be glad to help you."

“I hadn’t thought of that” Callie hugged Jon enjoying the feeling of them being so close. “I’d like that, who better to learn from than you, I’d be more comfortable with that.”

Jon continued to hug Callie, feeling the softness of her skin next to his. It was a great feeling He leaned back a bit to look at her, "Great! You being comfortable will help in your training as well. We can go to the holodeck to train."

Callie nodded. “Okay. I guess I’d best give myself some breathing space to recover properly first, otherwise Sam will have my hide for overdoing things.”

"Definitely give yourself time to recover love. We don't want Sam on head hunting mission because if you got hurt, she would come after me as well."

"That's very true!" Callie couldn't help but grin. "I promise no overdoing things, otherwise I'll never get my abilities back to full strength again."

Jon chuckled at Callie's statement. "I know you won't overdo it Callie and i know you want your abilities back at full strength and I want you healthy and well."

Callie nodded. "Aye Sir!" she gave him a big smile. "You always know how to cheer me up."

Jon let out a full-bodied laugh at Callie's reply and her big smile. "I swear, I am the luckiest man in the universe to have a wife as loving and understanding as you."

“Be careful or all these compliments might just go to my head!” Callie grinned.

Jon laughed again. "You deserve all the compliments I can think of and lavish on you. As to going to your head, nah, you are too modest to let that happen."

Callie smiled. “Thank you Imzadi, I don’t know what I’d do without you.” She stifled a yawn.

"You are welcome darling." Jon replied noticing Callie's yawn he added, "I don't know what you would do either as you would no longer have your favorite pillow." He finished with a chuckle.

Callie smiled. "That's very true" she shifted position slightly before her eyes got heavy and she drifted back to sleep, safe in the knowledge that she was home again.

 

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