‘A Friend In Need’

Posted on Sun Aug 28th, 2022 @ 2:58am by Commander Samantha Howard & Lieutenant Commander Shoniara T’ghann-Travis Dr

Mission: A Trip to Middle Earth
Location: Sickbay USS Washington
Timeline: Post holodeck

Lieutenant Commander Shoniara T’ghann-Travis made her way slowly to the turbolift. Whenever she was sitting or lying down she felt as though she could immediately return to work, putting the horror of their holodeck adventure behind her. However the moment the motor assist bands tightened around her she knew she was, still, unable to return to her duties in sickbay. Although she was loving spending time with Shasta and Seth there was always a worry in the back of her mind regarding Sam and T’Plana and the various insults they had both suffered. That was why she had decided to make the, oh so long trip, to try to have a conversation with her boss and friend.

Entering sickbay she was pleased to see it quiet. She noted an Andorian female in the blue of medical standing over a biobed and was immediately interested in who she was. However Shon could see Sam sitting in her office slumped over a PaDD and she slowly made her way inside. “Sam?” Shon enquired softly as it appeared her CO was dozing. Shon placed her hand on Sam’s shoulder “Sam?”

The medical report was boring. Oh so very mind numbingly spacial awareness doping boring. Dr Perrim had restricted her from all but the most mundane of medical tasks. Routine physicals, minor injuries and routine treatments, nothing that would cause her any undue stress, which in itself was stressful. With nothing to stimulate her mind the words blurred together and her eyes slid closed in an effort to catch some sleep that wasn't filled with nightmares.

“SAM it’s Shon,” she said a little louder.

Sam bolted awake, hands clenched into tight fists and eyes wild with panic. "Who wha..." She looked around desperately trying to ground herself.

Shon sat down waiting for her. “Sam, it’s okay you’re safe.” She noted how gaunt and haunted Sam looked.

It took Sam a moment to get her bearings and for her breathing to settle to a more reasonable rate.
She looked at Shon "sorry, guess I'm still a little wound up" she apologised." How are you doing?"

“Improving slowly, like you I expect. I came to see how you are doing. You went through so much it doesn’t just go away!”

"Physically I'm fine, Dr Perrim said there wouldn't be any scarring. He's concerned about the psychological side though, and quite frankly so am I" Sam admitted, her cheeks colouring with shame. She couldn't meet her friend's eyes.

“Why are you frightened about the way you feel, you must know it’s normal right?” Shon carried on without waiting for a reply. “What you went through was horrific but you got through it, you did what you needed to do and there is no shame in how you feel, please…..talk to me, let me help you?”

"I'm frightened because I froze when the team needed me the most. Instead of protecting everyone, I was a liability where extra resources had to be allocated for 'protection'. I froze Shon, I froze when I shouldn't have and people nearly died" The words were heartfelt and the CMO believed them to be true.

“Oh Sam” Shon replied. “Yes, you froze that is true but what you were asked to do went against everything you swore as a Doctor. You do not enjoy violence as I do. For a while there I found joy in killing orcs and goblins. You, however do not have a violent bone in your body. Neither did you have any training with swords or arrows. If we had had phasers I am sure things would have been different. Sam you survived, because of my actions I actually died.” She took the hand of her friend. “My friend it was not ‘your job to protect everyone’ in that situation, it was not a medical one.” She waited for Sam to say something.

Sam shook her head sadly "I'm a doctor because I want to protect people, to help and to heal them. Not be the one who needs others to protect me. What if someone got killed cos I froze and you were protecting me when you could have been elsewhere?" The realm of what ifs was a dangerous game that even she knew better than to dabble in. Her mental state was dire though and she felt worthless.

Shon sighed, “Sam I am a fully paid up member of the ‘what if’
Team so the last thing I can do is remonstrate with you for feeling that way, but our lives have not stopped, we need, the ship needs her Chief Medical Officer. I need my mentor and my friend. See Callie or Jortho but the ship needs you to protect and look after them and that is what you can do. We swore an oath to heal and that does not ever stop. I will be back on duty as soon as Dr Perrim lets me, even if it is in a reduced capacity. Sam you have helped and protected so many people and we all love you.” Shon stood seeing Perrim waiting for her. “I have to get to my appointment but you are needed now, the ship needs you Sam, come back to us?” Shon stood with a whirr of her motor assist bands and then bent and kissed Sam on the cheek.

Off